[beevent]

you guys are right. i just feel like a dick for not even trying to end on good terms with someone ive known for four years. i dont want him to think of me as some "scary gay person that i should avoid" but as someone he can talk to. i try to be sympathetic with everyone i can and try and put myself in their shoes. i guess i just jumped the gun. both the times i asked him out were like 3 years ago so i was a bit more immature. i just feel like the typical "james charles" gay guy, and i really hate it. i dont want someone to look at me and instantly know that im gay and it really fucking sucks. i want to feel and be more masculine but sometimes i just forget, and it doesn't help that my voice is a bit higher than most guys. thank you guys for the help though i really wasnt expecting a response.