[Sam260]

College was a weird time for anyone, but especially weird and definitely difficult for the Freshmen class.  They were in new territories, there were new rules, new people and for some, even new cities.  This is why most colleges implemented having Resident Advisors - or RA's - to dorms across America.  It helped new students acclimate to their new surroundings as well as go to their advisors for any help they needed along the way through their freshmen year.

One such advisor happened to be Jeremiah Bell - College Junior at the time - He was a RA for the Freshman Boy's Dorm B, where all the artsy type students would be located; Graphics Design, Architectural, anything to do with art and design - this was where those students lived.  This is how Jeremy met his boyfriend and future husband Cameron Ivey - fresh faced nineteen year old looking to make his way as an architect in the world.

Now, Jeremy was not very much into Art but he was definitely into Cameron - aside from their degree differences, they found that they had a lot in common.  They built on those commonalities and had a very strong relationship with one another, and still do to this day.  Upon Cameron's graduating from college, Jeremy proposed to his boyfriend, and Cameron tearfully accepted the proposal.  It took them another year before they got married on the beach - both of their life-long dreams to do so.

They had wanted a family - not a large one, but they definitely wanted a couple of kids.  It seemed impossible to do, but for some reason Cameron's body was not cooperating with their efforts to conceive.  They kept trying, discussing their options - should we adopt, should we give up, should we try in-vetro fertilization, hormonal drug therapy, or even surrogacy - they had a lot of options open and readily available to them as a successful Architect and Veterinarian Doctor.

It was eleven years in the making of their relationship, six years that they had been trying to get pregnant and the efforts seemed so fruitless and devastating time-after-time when they thought they had become pregnant.  Only a few times had they actually conceived, but something seemed to go wrong - the pregnancy became nonviable and had to be terminated before the fetus made it past a certain point.  It was depressing, heartbreaking, and seemed impossible, but the couple was determined more than ever to bring a child into this world that they would do just about anything.

Just this year, the couple decided that they would make one last effort and take the Hormone Drug Therapy treatment that Cameron's obstetrician suggested as it would enable them to conceive naturally, but with the added help of drugs to produce enough eggs and keep them viable.  It was a struggle, at first, for Cameron to take the shots and keep up with not only work, but his ovulation cycle -- They had to work around their schedules constantly to try and seed properly.

--*--*--*--*--*--*-- RP START --*--*--*--*--*--*--

Jeremy sighed as he came into the condominium that he and Cameron just recently moved into - A newly built structure of Cameron's; the owner having given them first dibs on a place here.  It was a godsend to the couple, as their tiny one bedroom apartment was becoming cramped with all of the things they had started collecting over the years of their relationship.  They now had a spacious and very open-layout condo with four bedrooms - they lived on the twentieth floor, the top level and even had a very nice garden area just outside of their condo.

Jeremy set his messenger bag down on the counter, pulled out his lunch bag and tossed it on the counter "Hey hun!  I'm home!  Where are you at?" Jeremy called out to his husband, hoping to find him quickly.  He was always excited to come home, hoping that the news of their previous infertility would finally change - he knew he shouldn't get so hopeful about it, because it always seemed to lead toward disappointment, but still he hoped for a change in their circumstances.

Becoming parents had been Jeremy and Cameron's shared dream for as long as they could remember - even dating back to when they first started dating.  They in no-way wanted an overly huge family, but they at least wanted two kids - it just seemed like an utterly impossible task where they were concerned.  Fruitless attempt after fruitless attempt.  Heartbreak after heartbreak.  But Jeremy held out hope that one day they would become parents, and they would get the chance at raising their children.

[jrcash]

Dread. That was all Cameron felt staring at a pregnancy test that sat on the corner of there marble bathroom sink. Cameron adjusted himself more comfortably on the toilet as he waited what seemed like an eternity. Looking up at the clock they had hanging above the bathroom mirror memories began to flood his mind. All the countless times him and Jeremiah tried to have children but the result was always the same.

Cameron got up for a second as the clock passed yet another long minute and walked over to the mirror and looked at himself with shock. He had bags under his eyes for not sleeping for nearly twenty eight hours now. He spent half the previous night throwing up in the toilet and the other half wondering what was wrong. Was he sick, was the hormonal treatment harming him somehow, or was it what he and his husband were hoping for more than anything. Putting his right hand against his flat smooth belly he began to fantasize what he would look like if his dreams did come true and he became pregnant. Thinking of his flat and skinny body becoming this huge orb like shape that weighed him down kind of seemed unbelievable. He shook his head trying not to give his hopes up too much he didn't want to set him self for yet another disappointment.

The time finally came he lifted up the pregnancy test to his eyes which began to tear up with anticipation. The lines became blurred and out of focus as Cameron tried to look at the test he was holding up to his face. Trying to focus his vision he became dizzy and nauseous. Suddenly to his joy he saw it the blue line what he had been looking for then past few years of trying. Filled with joy Cameron got son excited he dropped the pregnancy test on the floor and began to jump up and down which he realized was a mistake. He began to feel his stomach churning real bad and the vomit coming up he ran back to the toilet flipping open the lid and continued to hurl. As he was puking he heard the front door open and his husband calling for him. " over here!". Cameron tried calling out in between vomiting sessions.

[Sam260]

Jeremy followed the sound of his husband's voice and puking. He had spent a lot of the night worrying about Cameron and whether or not they should go to the hospital - Cameron adamantly refused going to the hospital and Jeremy understood that. A lot of their fears surrounded hospitals and doctors telling them bad news. Jeremy entered the master bedroom and cracked open the window near the bathroom door before entering it.

Leaning against the doorjamb, Jeremy looked in at his husband and frowned heavily. Seeing the love of his life curled over the toilet bowl was breaking his heart more and more. "Are you sure you don't want to go see a doctor?" Jeremy asked quietly - He was worried that his husband was truly sick and the vomiting all night was sapping the energy from Cameron. He also worried about dehydration and lack of nutrients since he was certain Cameron hadn't eaten much, if at all, while he had gone off to work.

He didn't want to leave, but unfortunately he was called away due to an animal who had been run over and needed emergency surgery. It was times like those he hated the most - not only because an animal was in such pain, but because he hated leaving his husband when they both had the day off. The surgery lasted just a little over ten hours, and now he was home, just to be right back where they started last night - Cameron sick as a dog and refusing treatment.

[jrcash]

Finally finishing his last upchuck Cameron reached for the top of the toilet to flush it. As he watched the spiral of the water he looked up at his husband staring a him with concern. "I should be fine really. " Cameron said wiping his mouth off with his sleeve. As he saw saw the pregnancy test he dropped on then floor rushing to the toilet he reached for it picking it up. Slowy getting to his feet he looked at the test again joy filling him once again at the sight of that blue line. "I think we will both be fine now." Cameron said smiling as he handed the test to Jeremy awaiting to see the same joy on his face. Still feeling a bit dizzy Cameron went to the bathroom sink to splash a bit of water on his face and clean himself up a bit.

[Sam260]

Jeremy took the test from Cameron and stared at the little clear blue line. He was shocked, more than anything, but that little bubble of joy and hope he always felt when a pregnancy test came back positive was starting to bubble up.

"Do you think...?" he could hardly finish his sentence, emotion clogging his throat and tears forming in his eyes. He set the pregnancy test down on the marble countertop and moved in close to his husband. "This one is going to make it...I can just tell." Jeremy said quietly, setting his hand on Cameron's still flat stomach "He has to make it."

Jeremy wrapped his arms around Cameron's shoulders and kissed his husband lightly on the lips. He finally let his tears fall freely - they were going to become parents, come hell or high water, he was determined enough for the both of them to bring their unborn child into the world without further complication. He closed his eyes and leaned his head against Cameron's - thinking, wishing, dreaming about the future and what their son or daughter would look like and be like. He hoped that their child got Cameron's features and kind-hearted soul, it would be for the best all around if that were the case.

[jrcash]

Cameron and Jeremy held each other for nearly twenty minutes before letting each other go. Cameron went into the kitchen to get a glass of water. After filling the glass he sat at the table and just stared at the glass. Dozens of thoughts flooded his mind. He Would have to work from home, how would he tell his and jeremys parents?, would they even be good parents? Its what both of them always wanted but now Cameron was worried if they were even prepared for what was about to happen.

"I don't think I want to tell anyone especially from work." Cameron said to Jeremy as he layed his hands on his thin belly. Cameron knew it would be impossible to hide for too much longer. Cameron just didn't know if people would understand pregnant men were still frowned upon in society and he didn't want to draw too much attention to his and Jeremy's relationship and open it up for scrutiny.

[Sam260]

Jeremy sat at the table and set his hand on top of Cameron's "If you don't want any of our work associate's knowing, I support you in that decision. But I think we should at least tell our parents - they support our relationship and both sets knew we wanted to have children one day." Jeremy rubbed his thumb across Cameron's knuckles and smiled softly.

"We will tell them, after we're one hundred percent sure that this pregnancy is going to stick and you're a little bit further along. What do you think about that?" he questioned, getting down onto his knees in front of Cameron, pressing his face lightly against his husband's stomach -- he couldn't wait to tell his mother, at least, the news of their pregnancy - if it lasted - she was always so supportive and heartbroken each time they thought they would be bringing a child into this world. If this pregnancy lasted through, she would be thrilled and probably be making plans to move to the city so she could be closer to her grandchild.

[jrcash]

Smiling down at his husband Cameron chuckled. " ok we can tell our parents. Maybe we should tell them before I can't fit through the door anymore though." Cameron said joking around as he seen Jeremy press his head against his stomach. Thinking about all the things they had to buy in the coming months made Cameron a bit squimish. " I'm going to have to work overtime while I still can to pay for all the stuff we need. The baby will need diapers, bottles, a crib, clothes. Speaking of clothes in going to blimp out I have to buy some clothes." Cameron began to cry thinking about all the stuff they needed and how they were going to pay for it all.

[Sam260]

Jeremy sighed as he leaned up, wrapping his husband up in his arms "Hey... shhh." he soothed, rubbing his hand up and down Cameron's back "We don't have to worry about any of that right now. We need to make sure this baby is going to stick with us and join our family before we can even consider buy cribs, diapers, bottles - any of that stuff." Jeremy said seriously, pulling back to look into his husband's tear soaked eyes.

Jeremy wiped the tears away with the pads of his thumbs "Let's just take this slowly, one step at a time. You need to schedule an appointment with your doctor, so they can confirm that you are truly pregnant and see what our options are for keeping him or her safe and helping the baby get through nine months of pregnancy." Jeremy said reasonably -- It hurt to have to be so blunt with his husband, especially after trying to get pregnant for so many years... But with their dreams always coming to a shattering end, they needed to be prepared for the worst and hope for the best at the same time.